maybe, like me, you’re ten days into this new year and already need a do-over. you’ve already missed a workout or cheated on your diet, missed a morning devotion, overslept, showed up late, done whatever it was you swore you wouldn’t do this year. you’ve already turned your eyes to things that don’t matter, crawled back to the sin you swore you wouldn’t or crumbled under the weight of your own too-high expectations.
i’m a resolution-maker. each new year, i believe that this will be it. that somehow, the turning of the calendar will make me this on-time, put-together, ultra-disciplined all-star who loves to wake up before the sun to work out, read entire books of the bible and drink kale smoothies before i get ready for work. (jesus, help me. for all the times i’ve over-slept and been out the door in twenty minus with re-curled hair and a handful of trail mix for breakfast, forgive me.) the problem is this. the 11:59 resolution-making, breath-holding me is the same girl that’ll be standing there post-ball drop with a laundry list of impossible standards. i can’t be everything i want to resolve myself into being. 2015 me couldn’t, and 2016 me won’t be able to either. but there’s hope.
“today and every day, he is our new beginning.”
there is grace for our unresolved resolutions, for our unmet standards and our new-year flops. i believe that god can give me the strength to wake up and dig deep into the only Words that are going to get me through the day. i believe he can teach me to take better care of my body, to choose healthy and whole. i believe he can turn my eyes from the worthless idols and distractions i’d like to leave in 2015. but more than any of that, i believe that jesus is everything i can’t ever be, despite my best resolutions. that he never falls short, that he’s everything he says and everything we need. that when i lay my brokenness at his feet, he makes it beautiful. that he promises us a spirit that will do the hard work and that he never asked us to fix ourselves in the first place. that he already knows we never could and it has never made him unsure about loving us anyway.
let our resolution be to follow jesus, to know him more, to surrender to him the parts of our lives and ourselves we’re not content with, believing him to do the work. let’s ask him to turn our eyes to him when we want to skip the workouts our bodies need, when we want to eat cinnamon rolls for dinner (hypothetically), when we tried so hard to be on time and just weren’t, when we’ve left no resolution unbroken and when we’re tempted to make it all about us making ourselves better. let’s make it all about jesus, this year and every year. about putting his good work on display for his glory. about knowing him and making him known. about trusting him with every part of our lives and all of who we are. “in him all things were made” and “in him all things hold together” and if we fix our eyes on that and and set our hearts on him, i really do believe it will change everything.